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With
Valentine’s Day fast approaching, our thoughts turn to romance and
passion-how to get it and keep it! One of the most frequently asked
questions of me is “How can I find romance/soul mate?” (It
should also be noted that I’ve also been asked how to get rid of a
partner as well!). It is very easy to utilize basic Feng Shui and
interior design principles into your romance area and bedroom to create
the “perfect” atmosphere for romance.
First off, you
should locate the “romance” or “partnership” area of your home
and/or bedroom. This area is the FAR RIGHT corner of the home/room
when standing at the doorway looking into the space. This is the
area you really want to pay attention to if you’d like to attract/keep
relationship in your life. (It should also be noted that
relationships can mean friendships or business partnerships as well,
however, for the purpose of this article, we are referring to romantic
relationships). This area should feature items in TWOS-think a
couple. If things are displayed in ONES (solitary) or in THREES (a
third person will come between you and your partner literally or
figuratively) change it! It is common for a single person to
primarily have things displayed in this very way-CHANGE IT!
Think romance.
This will differ for each person-what’s romantic for me, might not mean
romance for you. Here you can place romantic pictures, fabrics,
flowers…create a romantic vignette. I did this with an older
client in her bedroom: we placed a small table with 2 small chairs
in her romance area. We then set a “romantic tableau” with 2
candles, roses and a picture of an Irish landscape. She had traveled
to Ireland and thought it was the most beautiful place she had ever
visited. She then lit the candles every night before she went to bed
to increase or “bring light” to her intention of bringing more romance
into her life. A few months later she started seeing a gentleman
socially and is very happy.
Color also
plays a part in this area. Use RED if you are in a committed/legal
relationship, PINK if you are single and looking to attract a relationship
or PEACH/CORAL if you are single and looking, but not for a relationship
(be careful w/peach!). It should be noted that any tone, tint or
shade of the above mentioned colors would work. Bring the color in
with flowers, fabric, artwork, candles…be creative.
In Feng Shui,
the relationship area is represented by EARTH energy. Items made
from the earth symbolize this: tile, stone, terra cotta…or by earth
tones or square shaped items. Look at this area to see if any of the
above is visible in this area. If it is and you are still having
problems, add FIRE energy. In the productive cycle (increasing) of
Feng Shui, fire produces earth. Therefore, by adding FIRE you will
be boosting the EARTH energy of the relationship area. To bring in
FIRE add candles (!), pictures of famous couples or triangular shaped
items. An example of this is: 2 pink/red candles-lit in a square
holder. Easy!
The bedroom in
general should be a place of refuge and sanctuary from the rest of the
world. There should be no TVs, computers or exercise equipment in
this room! There should only be 2 things going on in the bedroom and
watching TV or working on the computer is not on the list. If you
can’t move these items to another location, cover them with a screen or
fabric panels to disguise them. Also, lie down in your bed and look
at what you see from this position. This is, subconsciously, the
first thing you see in the morning and the last thing you see before you
drift off to sleep-make sure the view is good! Is it the bathroom?
Close the door. Is it a blank wall? Hang some artwork.
Get the idea? Speaking of artwork, the bedroom is not the place for
pictures of your kids, family and/or friends-the only people in pictures
should be of you and your current partner! No old boyfriends please!
Again, you don’t want “outside disturbances” bothering you in your
private, romantic sanctuary!
The bedroom is
also a place to splurge and really treat yourself. Buy the most
expensive sheets, blankets and pillow that you can afford. We spend
1/3 of our lives sleeping so we should get the most out of it. Plus,
a high thread count cotton sheet lasts longer and is softer and offers
more comfort than it’s cheaper, low thread count cotton/poly blends.
Buy organic cotton if possible if allergies or environmental sensitivities
or concerns are an issue. These are available at most large bedding
stores and comparable in price.
Clutter should
not exist in this room-PERIOD. Anyone who has ever taken one of my
workshops knows the dangers and ills of clutter and what chaos it causes,
however, here in the bedroom, where you are trying to establish peace and
calm-clutter does not fit. The rules again are: if you don’t use,
wear it or love it, get rid of it. I don’t care how much it cost
or who gave it to you, it isn’t doing you any good sitting in the closet
or (heaven forbid) under the bed. Donate it so someone who can use
it, wear it or love it can have it. Clutter also collects dust and
is hard to maintain-again, counter productive to the mood of the bedroom.
This example has come more times than I care to admit exist: knife and gun
collections in the bedroom. This is a no-brainer-get them out of
this room if you must have them. Knives and guns symbolize violence
and (again) are not part of romance. If there is absolutely no other
place for them, place them securely in a closet, not under the bed.
Think of what this symbolizes whether you are romantically involved or
not.
Lastly, if you’ve done all of these things and this
area still isn’t working for you…check the floor plan of your
home/bedroom and see if there is a missing corner. Your home/rooms
should be square or rectangular. However, due to additions or
attached garages, the home is L-shaped, thusly, there is a missing area.
Check if this is the case and if the missing area is the relationship
area. This was the case for another client. Her home, due to a
kitchen expansion, now had no relationship area. This is an easy fix
though! We really worked on the bedroom to make it a romantic
sanctuary for her. Then we went outside and symbolically created a
corner to square off the house with a bird feeder and some garden statuary
and flowers. Three weeks after she did this, she met someone whom
she started dating. They just got engaged this Christmas and are
getting married! Now, if Feng Shui totally responsible? Maybe,
maybe not. However, creating the intention of romance and bringing
forth the feelings that this is what you want in your life and consciously
making an effort to do so by manipulating your environment is.
Valentine’s Day is a special day of the year-but shouldn’t every
day be Valentine’s Day for our loved ones and ourselves? With Feng
Shui and color, you can make your bedroom the Valentine’s Day retreat
you want and need all year long.
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